The Dudela Podcast | Fatherhood Real Talk for New Dads

Baby #2 Is Coming: What I'm Doing Differently This Pregnancy
 
The Dudela family is growing.
Michael and Abigail are expecting baby girl number two, due on Christmas Day.
And pregnancy feels a little different the second time around.
In this episode of The Dudela Podcast, John sits down with Michael to talk about what pregnancy number two has actually been like, what he learned the first time, and what he is intentionally doing differently as a husband and dad this time around.
Because during your first pregnancy, everything is new.
You are tracking the baby's size every week. You are Googling symptoms. You are trying to figure out which appointments matter. You are buying baby gear you have never heard of. You are wondering how much everything is going to cost. And somewhere in the middle of all of that, you are trying to figure out what your pregnant wife actually needs from you.
The second time, you know a little more about what is coming.
Michael shares what has been different during Abigail's second pregnancy, including more nausea, earlier body changes, food aversions, cravings, preparing their toddler Riley to become a big sister, moving into a bigger home, and realizing just how quickly the second pregnancy seems to move.
We also talk about why the halfway point of pregnancy can be such an important moment for dads.
Around 20 weeks, the pregnancy can suddenly start feeling very real. There is a growing belly. You may be feeling the baby move. The anatomy scan gives you an incredible look at your child. And the countdown toward labor, delivery, and newborn life starts getting a whole lot shorter.
That is when preparation matters.
Michael shares why dads should prioritize important ultrasound appointments, how to support your wife when her body starts changing quickly, why you need to become a better listener instead of trying to solve everything, and how taking things off your wife's mental load can make a huge difference.
We also get into the reality of preparing financially for another baby, planning a babymoon, getting ready for sleepless nights again, deciding which baby products are actually worth keeping, and figuring out how to give your first child the attention they need when a newborn enters the family.
And if you are nervous about becoming a dad?
That is okay too.
You do not need to have fatherhood figured out before your baby arrives.
You just need to start becoming the kind of dad who wants to figure it out.
In This Episode
Michael and Abigail are expecting baby girl number two
Why pregnancy number two feels completely different
Their Christmas Day due date
What has surprised Michael during the second pregnancy
Pregnancy nausea, cravings, food aversions, and exhaustion
Why the baby bump can show earlier during a second pregnancy
What pregnancy feels like when you already have a toddler
Preparing your first child to become a big sister or brother
What dads should know around 20 weeks pregnant
Why dads should attend important ultrasound appointments
What to expect from the anatomy scan
When pregnancy starts feeling real for dads
How to support your pregnant wife without trying to fix everything
Becoming a better listener during pregnancy
Taking things off your wife's mental load without waiting to be asked
Why pregnancy requires dads to become more selfless
Preparing financially for hospital bills, diapers, formula, and newborn life
What Michael learned financially from baby number one
Preparing for sleepless nights when you already have a toddler
How to make sure your first child still feels seen after baby arrives
Why a babymoon is worth considering
The best time during pregnancy to get away together
Baby products Michael will use again
Baby products they probably will not buy again
Why bottle feeding flexibility can help dads become more involved
How fatherhood changes what you consider important
Why it is normal for expecting dads to feel nervous
Becoming the dad you want to be before baby arrives
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This episode is for you.
Follow Michael's Pregnancy in Real Time With The Womb Watch
Michael is not just talking about this pregnancy after the fact.
We are documenting it as it happens.
The Womb Watch follows Michael and Abigail through pregnancy number two in real time.
Every few weeks, John and Michael sit down for shorter conversations about what is happening right now, including appointments, ultrasounds, milestones, what Abigail is experiencing, what Michael is learning, and what dads coming behind him should know.
If your wife recently got pregnant, you can essentially follow along with another dad who is just a little farther down the road.
The Womb Watch is exclusively available inside the Spit Up Society.
Join the Spit Up Society
You do not have to figure out fatherhood alone.
For $5 per month, the Spit Up Society gives you access to The Womb Watch, exclusive Dudela content, and two live calls with us every month where you can bring whatever questions you are dealing with right now.
Pregnancy.
Birth.
Postpartum.
Marriage.
Money.
Newborn life.
Fatherhood.
Bring it.
Join the Spit Up Society here:
https://thedudelaco.com/join/spit-up-society/
Find Resources for Your Exact Stage of Pregnancy
Not sure what you should actually be doing right now?
Head to Dudela and choose where you are in the pregnancy journey.
We have resources designed to help dads understand what matters at different stages so you can spend less time Googling and more time actually preparing.
https://thedudelaco.com/
Free Dad Prep Guide
If you just found out you are going to be a dad, start here.
https://www.thedudelaco.com/guide
Our free Dad Prep Guide covers the things we wish someone had told us before becoming dads and gives you practical ways to start preparing for pregnancy, birth, postpartum, and newborn life.
Dudela Prep Kit
Want to take preparation seriously?
https://dudelaco.gumroad.com/l/dudela-prep-kit
The Dudela Prep Kit gives first time dads a practical framework for preparing for fatherhood, including your relationship, emotions, finances, labor and delivery, postpartum, family identity, and life after your baby arrives.
Because knowing more is helpful.
Doing something with what you know is what actually prepares you.
Ask Dudela
Are you somewhere in pregnancy right now and have a question?
Maybe you just saw the positive pregnancy test and have no idea what happens next.
Maybe you are heading into the anatomy scan.
Maybe your wife is miserable and you do not know how to help.
Maybe you are excited about becoming a dad but also quietly terrified.
Send it to us.
Leave John and Michael a voicemail through the Dudela website. We listen to every message, and your question may become part of a future podcast or live conversation.
https://thedudelaco.com/
Follow Dudela
Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/the_dudela_official/
TikTok
https://www.tiktok.com/@the_dudela_official
YouTube
https://www.youtube.com/@TheDudela-Official
Facebook
https://www.facebook.com/p/The-Dudela-61566037880710/
Your Challenge This Week
If your wife is pregnant, ask yourself one question:
What is something she is carrying right now that I can carry for her?
Do not ask her to create a list for you.
Look around.
Maybe it is dinner.
Maybe it is laundry.
Maybe it is getting up with your toddler on Saturday morning so she can sleep.
Maybe it is researching the car seat.
Maybe it is making the appointment.
Maybe she just needs you to listen without trying to solve anything.
Find one thing.
Own it.
Because preparing for fatherhood is not just about knowing what happens next.
It is about becoming the kind of man your family can count on when it does.
 

What do moms actually wish dads understood about pregnancy, postpartum, and becoming parents?
This time, we decided to stop answering for them.
In this episode of The Dudela Podcast, John and Michael are joined by their wives, Vivian and Abigail, for an honest conversation about pregnancy, postpartum, marriage, motherhood, careers, community, and what support from a husband actually looks like when life gets hard.
And there is some pretty big Dudela family news.
Michael and Abigail are expecting baby number two, another girl.
That means Dudela is officially going through another pregnancy in real time.
We talk about what this pregnancy has looked like so far, pregnancy nausea and food aversions, preparing for a second baby, and what Abigail needs from Michael during pregnancy that she does not always know how to ask for.
But this conversation goes much deeper than pregnancy.
Viv opens up about how difficult the postpartum season was after having twins and what it felt like to lose part of herself during those early months of motherhood. She shares why patience, grace, friendship, and having people around her mattered so much while she figured out who she was becoming.
Abigail shares what it is like balancing motherhood with a career she genuinely loves, the guilt that can come with being a working mom, and why having a husband who encourages her career instead of making her feel guilty about it has mattered so much.
We also get into something every expecting dad needs to hear.
Your wife may not always be able to tell you exactly what she needs.
Sometimes supporting her means paying attention.
Take the baby.
Handle bath time.
Figure out dinner.
Give her permission to rest.
Encourage her to spend time with friends.
Make the decision she is too exhausted to make.
Create room for the parts of her identity that exist outside of being a mom.
And during postpartum, understand that the woman beside you is experiencing one of the biggest physical, hormonal, emotional, and identity changes of her life.
She may not seem exactly like the woman you married for a while.
That does not mean something has gone wrong.
She is becoming someone new too.
This conversation is about learning how to become parents together, how to build a village around your family, and how husbands and wives can give each other grace while everyone figures it out.
Whether you are trying for a baby, expecting your first, preparing for the fourth trimester, or already deep in toddler life, there is something in this conversation for you.
In This Episode
• Michael and Abigail announce baby number two
• What this pregnancy has actually been like so far
• Pregnancy nausea, exhaustion, and food aversions
• Preparing for a second baby versus preparing for your first
• What pregnant wives actually need from their husbands
• Why your wife may struggle to ask you for help
• Learning to anticipate your partner's needs
• Why decision fatigue is so real for moms
• Giving your wife permission to rest without guilt
• What dads need to understand about the postpartum season
• Giving your wife grace during the fourth trimester
• What it feels like when your spouse does not seem like herself after baby
• Postpartum identity changes and becoming a mom
• Supporting your wife's career after having kids
• Working mom guilt and balancing career with motherhood
• Why friendships and community matter so much after having kids
• Building your village before you desperately need one
• Why parenting alongside friends makes the hard seasons easier
• Understanding that toddler behavior is communication
• How dads can respond differently to tantrums and difficult behavior
• Why your child's behavior is not always about you
• Creating meaningful family moments out of ordinary days
• Learning your strengths as a mom and dad
• Becoming a team instead of keeping score
If You've Ever Searched
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This episode is for you.
Meet the Wives
For this episode, we handed part of the microphones over to the women who have been beside Dudela from the beginning.
Abigail is a Board Certified Behavior Analyst with a background in Applied Behavior Analysis. She works with children on developmental skills, communication, behavior, and helping families understand why behaviors happen in the first place.
One of her biggest reminders for dads in this episode is simple:
Behavior is communication.
When your toddler is screaming, hitting, melting down, or doing something that drives you insane, it is easy to take that behavior personally.
But your child may simply be trying to communicate something they do not yet have the language or skills to express.
Vivian is a mom of twins, entrepreneur, and wedding planner behind The Alpenglow Edit. Her love for creating meaningful moments has carried directly into motherhood and the way she and John intentionally create traditions, adventures, and memories with their girls.
She also gets honest about the harder side of becoming a mom, including the postpartum season and eventually finding parts of herself again through starting her business.
Together, they give us something we want more of on Dudela:
The mom's side of the story.
The Womb Watch Is Coming
With Michael and Abigail expecting their second daughter, we have been documenting this pregnancy behind the scenes.
The Womb Watch follows their pregnancy in real time through appointments, conversations, questions, preparation, and Michael figuring out what it means to go through pregnancy as a dad for the second time.
The Womb Watch is exclusive content for members of the Spit Up Society.
Join the Spit Up Society
The podcast is where we talk about fatherhood.
The Spit Up Society is where we get to talk with you.
For $5 per month, you get access to two live Dudela Q&A calls every month, The Womb Watch, exclusive content, behind the scenes conversations, early access to Dudela resources, and a community of dads figuring this stuff out together.
Our live calls happen on the first Tuesday and third Thursday of every month.
Bring your questions about pregnancy, birth, postpartum, newborn life, marriage, finances, fatherhood, or whatever you are dealing with right now.
Can't make the live call? Members get access to the recordings too.
Join the Spit Up Society here:
https://thedudelaco.com/join/spit-up-society/
Free Dad Prep Guide
Preparing for your first baby?
Start here:
https://www.thedudelaco.com/guide
Our free Dad Prep Guide gives expecting dads practical advice for pregnancy, birth, postpartum, and becoming a father.
Dudela Prep Kit
Want to go deeper?
https://dudelaco.gumroad.com/l/dudela-prep-kit
The Dudela Prep Kit is our complete roadmap for first time dads preparing for labor, delivery, postpartum, and life with a newborn.
It includes 33 pages, 6 pillars, and 9 printable tools designed to help you stop wondering what you should be doing and start preparing for what comes next.
Ask Dudela
Have a question you want us to answer?
Maybe your wife is pregnant and you have no idea what she needs.
Maybe you are struggling through the newborn stage.
Maybe your toddler is losing their mind and you cannot figure out why.
Maybe you just need another dad's perspective.
Leave us a voicemail directly through the Dudela website. We listen to every message and may answer yours on the podcast or during one of our live conversations.
Follow Dudela
Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/the_dudela_official/
TikTok
https://www.tiktok.com/@the_dudela_official
YouTube
https://www.youtube.com/@TheDudela-Official
Facebook
https://www.facebook.com/p/The-Dudela-61566037880710/
Your Challenge This Week
Ask your wife one question:
What is one thing I could take completely off your plate this week?
Then listen.
And if you already know the answer, do not make her manage you through it.
Take the kids.
Make dinner.
Handle bedtime.
Clean the kitchen.
Give her an hour alone.
Make the decision.
Whatever it is, own it from beginning to end.
Being a steady dad is not always about knowing exactly what to say.
Sometimes it is simply noticing what your family needs and showing up before someone has to ask.

Trying should be the fun part, right?
Trying for a baby is supposed to be the fun part. Then the ovulation strips show up, the fertile window turns into a deadline, and sex starts feeling like something you're clocking into.
Nobody really preps dads for that.
In this episode, John and Michael sit down outside in Dillon, Colorado (concert crowd noise included) to talk honestly about trying to conceive: John and Viv's five months, Michael and Abigail's six to eight, and every emotion that showed up in between.
They get into the stuff most guys never say out loud. The pressure of being "the star of the show" — if you don't perform, there's no baby. The mindset shift of scheduled sex, and how to actually make it fun instead of clinical. What it felt like when a pregnancy test came back negative and not realizing until that night how much the moment meant to his wife. The golf trip Michael was on when Abigail got a negative test the morning of his sister's baby shower, and what he learned about not being emotionally present for it.
They also cover the practical side: tracking ovulation, timing morning sex around testosterone levels, why hot tubs are a fertility myth worth knowing about, and when it's worth getting your own levels checked. And the mental side almost nobody addresses — the eight inches between your ears that start asking "is this ever going to work" after a few negative tests in a row.
But the bigger point isn't the biology. It's that the trying season, hard as it is, is a chance to build the communication and partnership that carries you into parenthood. John's twins were conceived on Leap Day, an accident neither of them expected, after months of turning a stressful window into something they looked forward to together.
If you've been trying for one month or two years, this is a reminder you're not the only one white-knuckling the two-week wait, and you don't have to carry it alone.
🍼 In This Episode
What trying to conceive actually feels like for dads, not just moms
Why the fertile window creates pressure most men don't talk about
Scheduled sex: how to keep intimacy fun instead of clinical
The "star of the show" pressure and how to handle an off night
What to do when a pregnancy test comes back negative, and how to actually support your wife in that moment
Tracking ovulation, morning timing, and other practical strategies
Why hot tubs, diet, and drinking habits are worth a second look while trying
The mental side of trying to conceive that men rarely admit to
How comparison creeps in when friends start having kids
Turning the trying season into a foundation for your relationship, not just a means to an end
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This episode is for you.
 
🧡 Resources for Dads
Free Dad Prep Guide - https://www.thedudelaco.com/guideIf you're preparing for your first baby, start here. Our free guide covers the things we wish someone had told us before becoming dads and gives you practical ways to start preparing now.
Dudela Prep Kit - https://www.thedudelaco.com/kitWant to go deeper? The Dudela Prep Kit is our complete preparation framework for dads, $37, covering pregnancy, birth, postpartum, your relationship, emotions, finances, newborn life, and the transition into fatherhood.
🎙️ Ask Another DadGoing through something you want to talk about? Maybe you're trying for a baby. Maybe pregnancy is kicking your ass. Maybe your newborn won't sleep. Maybe you just need another dad's perspective.
Leave John and Michael a voicemail at thedudelaco.com/voicemail, or email dude@thedudelaco.com. We listen to every one and respond when we can.
🤝 Join the Spit-Up SocietySometimes you don't need another article or Google search. You need other dads.
The Spit-Up Society is $5 a month and gets you two live Q&A calls with John and Michael every month, a private community, and early access to merch and guides.
Join at https://www.thedudelaco.com/join/spit-up-society
 
📱 Follow Dudela
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/the_dudela_official/
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@the_dudela_official
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheDudela-Official
 
💪 Your Challenge This Week
If you're currently trying for a baby, have one conversation with your partner that has nothing to do with timing, ovulation, or whether this is "the month." Ask her how she's actually doing with all of this. Then tell her how you're doing too. No fixing it, no strategy, no calendar. Just talk.
Before you're mom and dad, you're still the two people building this family together. If trying has started to feel like work, find one way this week to make being together feel like the two of you again.

Every dad has strengths.
Every dad has weaknesses.
The question is whether you know what yours are.
In this episode of The Dudela Podcast, John and Michael revisit one of our most popular conversations about what dads should be focusing on and take it one step deeper. Instead of talking about checklists and preparation, we talk about the man behind the dad.
Because becoming a great father is not about pretending you're perfect. It's about knowing yourself well enough to build on your strengths, recognize your blind spots, and intentionally become the dad your family needs.
We share honest stories from the past two years of fatherhood, from potty training twins and emotional reactions to the simple moments that reveal who we're becoming. We talk about learning to pause before reacting, giving yourself grace after you mess up, communicating honestly with your spouse, and remembering that your kids are watching far more than they are listening.
Your children will copy your habits long before they understand your words.
The way you treat your wife.
The way you respond to stress.
The way you talk about yourself.
The way you apologize.
The way you lead.
Those are the things they'll remember.
Whether you're expecting your first baby or you're already chasing toddlers around the house, this episode will challenge you to take an honest look in the mirror and become a more intentional, emotionally steady father.
In This Episode
• Why every dad needs to know both his strengths and weaknesses
• The difference between reacting and responding
• How planning ahead helps you stay calm under pressure
• Potty training twins and learning patience in real time
• Why your kids copy everything you do, even the things you don't notice
• Building healthy communication with your spouse through regular check ins
• Giving yourself grace after losing your cool
• Why apologizing to your kids matters, even when they're too young to understand
• Leading your family with intention instead of emotion
• How dads and moms naturally bring different strengths to parenting
• Practical ways to become proactive instead of reactive
• Why becoming a better husband helps you become a better father
If You've Ever Searched
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This episode is for you.
Resources Mentioned
🧡 Free Dad Prep Guide
https://www.thedudelaco.com/guide
A practical guide packed with the essential things every expecting dad should know before baby arrives.
💪 Dudela Prep Kit
https://dudelaco.gumroad.com/l/dudela-prep-kit
Our complete fatherhood preparation framework covering pregnancy, birth, postpartum, finances, emotions, communication, and practical tools like the Brain Dump and One Word Check In.
🎙️ Ask Dudela
Have a question about fatherhood, pregnancy, marriage, or newborn life?
Leave us a voicemail directly on our website and we may answer it on a future episode.
🤝 Join the Spit Up Society
Join our live community of dads for just $5 per month.
You'll get access to two live Q&A sessions every month where we answer your questions, share practical fatherhood advice, and build community with dads who are in the same season of life.
Join here:
https://www.thedudelaco.com/Join
Patreonhttps://www.patreon.com/c/Dudela
or
Ko fihttps://ko-fi.com/dudela
📱 Follow Dudela
Instagramhttps://www.instagram.com/the_dudela_official/
TikTokhttps://www.tiktok.com/@the_dudela_official
YouTubehttps://www.youtube.com/@TheDudela-Official
Facebookhttps://www.facebook.com/p/The-Dudela-61566037880710/
Your Challenge This Week
Ask your spouse one simple question:
"What's one strength you see in me as a dad, and what's one area where I could grow?"
Listen without getting defensive.
Then ask yourself one more question:
Am I becoming the kind of dad I hope my kids remember?
Growth starts with honesty. And every great dad is still growing.

Everyone tells you to put your kids first.
But one of the best things you can do for your kids is invest in the relationship that started your family.
In this episode of The Dudela Podcast, John and Michael share what happened when they each took their first kid free trips with their wives after becoming parents. From airport freedom and uninterrupted dinners to missing their toddlers and rediscovering what it feels like to simply be husband and wife again, this conversation is an honest look at why healthy marriages create healthy families.
Leaving your baby for the first time can feel exciting, terrifying, and even a little guilt inducing. Is it too soon? Will they be okay? Should we even go?
We unpack those questions along with practical advice on when to plan your first overnight trip, how to lean on grandparents and your support system, why staying home isn't always enough for a real date night, and how stepping away from your daily routine helps you reconnect as a couple.
We also talk about something many new parents experience but rarely say out loud. After months of diapers, bottles, nap schedules, and surviving on little sleep, it's easy to forget the people you were before becoming mom and dad. Taking time away isn't about escaping your kids. It's about strengthening your marriage so you can come home refreshed, connected, and ready to lead your family well.
Whether you're expecting your first baby or you're deep in the toddler years, this episode is a reminder that your marriage deserves intentional investment too.
In This Episode
Why your marriage is one of the greatest gifts you can give your kids
What it felt like taking our first kid free vacations
How long you should actually get away as new parents
Date nights versus overnight trips and why both matter
The guilt of leaving your child for the first time
Why grandparents and your village are essential
How becoming parents completely changes the way you travel
Helping your kids become comfortable with trusted caregivers
Affordable getaway ideas for young families
Why getting out of your house helps you reconnect
Building a marriage that lasts beyond the parenting years
Practical ways to prioritize your spouse without feeling selfish
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This episode is for you.
Resources Mentioned
🧡 Free Dad Prep Guide
https://www.thedudelaco.com/guide
Prepare for pregnancy, birth, postpartum, and your baby's first year with practical advice built specifically for expecting dads.
💪 Dudela Prep Kit
https://dudelaco.gumroad.com/l/dudela-prep-kit
Our complete fatherhood preparation system with practical tools covering emotions, finances, communication, birth, postpartum, routines, and everything we wish someone had taught us before becoming dads.
🎙️ Ask Dudela
Have a question about pregnancy, fatherhood, marriage, or newborn life?
Leave us a voicemail directly on our website and we may answer it in a future episode.
🤝 Join the Spit Up Society
Join our live community of dads for just $5 per month.
Twice every month we host live Q&A calls where you can ask questions, share wins, learn from other dads, and build real community.
Join here:
Patreonhttps://www.patreon.com/c/Dudela
or
Ko fihttps://ko-fi.com/dudela
📱 Follow Dudela
Instagramhttps://www.instagram.com/the_dudela_official/
TikTokhttps://www.tiktok.com/@the_dudela_official
YouTubehttps://www.youtube.com/@TheDudela-Official
Facebookhttps://www.facebook.com/p/The-Dudela-61566037880710/
Your Challenge This Week
Pull out your calendar.
Find one date with your spouse.
Not "sometime next month."
An actual date.
Maybe it's dinner.
Maybe it's coffee.
Maybe it's one night away while grandparents watch the kids.
Put it on the calendar and protect it.
Because one day your kids will grow up and leave home.
The marriage you're building today is the relationship you'll still have then.

Everyone talks about the registry.Everyone talks about the nursery colors.Almost nobody tells you the real number.
At Dudela, we believe part of being a steady dad is being a prepared one. That means having the money conversation before the bills show up, not after.
In this episode of The Dudela Podcast, John and Michael break down the true cost of bringing a baby home, from the moment you see the plus sign through the first year of life. This is the conversation most guys don't have until they're staring at a credit card statement wondering where it all went.
The reality is that baby costs hit you in waves you don't see coming. Diapers alone will run through a box in under a month. Insurance deductibles reset the second you move from an individual plan to a family plan, which means you can hit your out of pocket max once during pregnancy and then hit it again when the baby arrives. Hospital bills show up weeks later with numbers that don't match what anyone told you at the appointment. And that's before you've bought a single onesie.
In this episode, we walk through real numbers. What a crib, dresser, and rocking chair actually cost. What a good car seat and stroller run you. What the average vaginal birth and C-section cost on insurance, and what the hospital will actually bill you if things go sideways. What a full first year costs excluding childcare, and what childcare itself adds on top of that. We also get into what nobody explains clearly, like why your out of pocket max resets, why five different people at your insurance company can give you five different answers, and why you need to ask the same question more than once before you trust it.
We also talk about the tools that help long term. Setting a household number you're both aligned on, even if it's arbitrary. 529 plans. The newer Trump Accounts for kids born within the eligible window. And why "set it and forget it" savings beats obsessing over a balance you can't change yet.
Most importantly, we talk about mindset. This isn't about scaring you. It's about giving you the landscape so you can plan instead of react, and so you and your wife are aligned before the first bill lands instead of blindsided by it.
🍼 In This Episode
Why the money conversation needs to start before the stroller conversation
How fast diapers, wipes, and formula actually add up
Why your insurance deductible and out of pocket max reset when you add a baby
What a vaginal birth and C-section typically cost on insurance
The real hospital bill numbers behind a NICU stay
What nursery setup actually costs, room by room
Car seats, strollers, and the gear that's worth spending more on
The gear that's worth buying used or skipping entirely
What a full first year of baby costs, excluding childcare
The real range for childcare and daycare per child
Why getting a second car seat base is a small cost with a big payoff
529 plans and Trump Accounts explained simply
Why aligning on a number as a couple matters more than the number itself
🎯 If You've Ever Searchedhow much does a baby cost the first yearcost of having a baby with insurancebaby budget for new dadshospital bill after birthinsurance out of pocket max pregnancyhow much do diapers cost per monthnursery setup costcost of daycare per monthfinancial planning for new dadshow to talk to my wife about money before baby529 plan for a babyTrump account for kidsbudgeting for a new babycost of raising a child in the first yearfinancial stress before baby arrivesThis episode is for you.
🧡 Resources Mentioned
Free Dad Prep Guide
Dudela Prep KitOur complete fatherhood preparation framework, including the financial planning tools and action steps to help you have the money conversation with your wife before the bills start showing up.
Ask DudelaNeed advice, have a question, or just need to vent? Leave us a voicemail directly on our website and we'll do our best to respond.
Follow Along
Instagram: @the_dudela_official
TikTok: @the_dudela_official
YouTube: The Dudela Official
Facebook: The Dudela
💪 Your Challenge This WeekPick a number.
Sit down with your wife and agree on a rough monthly number you're aiming to spend on baby expenses. It doesn't have to be right. It just has to be shared.
Then ask yourselves:Where can we cut back right now?Where can we grow our income?What's one bill we haven't talked about yet, like insurance, that we need to figure out this week?
You don't need the perfect number. You need to be aligned on one.

The Emotional Side of Fatherhood Nobody Talks About
Everyone talks about the baby's emotions.
Everyone talks about mom's emotions.
Almost nobody talks about dad's.
At Dudela, we believe one of the most important jobs of a father is becoming emotionally steady. Not emotionless. Not perfect. Steady.
In this episode of The Dudela Podcast, John and Michael dive into one of the most overlooked parts of fatherhood: your emotional health.
Whether you're expecting your first baby, navigating pregnancy with your partner, or already in the thick of diapers, sleep deprivation, toddler meltdowns, and family responsibilities, this conversation is for you.
The reality is that fatherhood can be emotionally exhausting. You're carrying work stress, financial pressure, relationship dynamics, family responsibilities, and the weight of wanting to be a great dad. Most guys respond the same way. They bottle it up. They push through. They tell themselves they'll deal with it later.
But eventually, later shows up.
In this episode, we unpack what it means to become a steady dad emotionally. Not a perfect dad. Not a dad who never struggles. A dad who understands what he's feeling, processes it in healthy ways, and shows up for his family with consistency instead of chaos.
We share practical tools from the Dudela Prep Kit, including the Brain Dump exercise and the One Word Check In. We talk about finding safe places to process emotions, building friendships that can handle real conversations, and why getting your emotions out of your head and into the open changes everything.
Most importantly, we talk about giving yourself grace. Fatherhood is hard because you care. The fact that you're thinking about these things means you're already doing more than most.
🍼 In This Episode
• Why fatherhood is an emotional rollercoaster before and after baby arrives
• What it means to be a steady dad emotionally
• Why dads tend to bottle up emotions instead of processing them
• Finding healthy outlets before bringing stress home
• The power of friendship and honest conversations between dads
• How exercise, movement, and getting outside help regulate emotions
• The Brain Dump exercise and why it clears mental clutter
• The One Word Check In and how it reveals emotional patterns over time
• Why emotional awareness creates a calmer home environment
• Giving yourself grace during difficult seasons of fatherhood
• What to do when you feel isolated, overwhelmed, or stuck
 
🎯 If You've Ever Searched
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new dad anxiety
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how to stay calm with toddlers
how to stop bringing work stress home
This episode is for you.
 
🧡 Resources Mentioned
• Free Dad Prep Guidehttps://www.thedudelaco.com/guide
• Dudela Prep Kithttps://dudelaco.gumroad.com/l/dudela-prep-kit
Our complete fatherhood preparation framework featuring the Brain Dump exercise, One Word Check In, and practical tools for navigating pregnancy, birth, and the first year of fatherhood.
• Ask DudelaNeed advice, have a question, or just need to vent? Leave us a voicemail directly on our website and we'll do our best to respond.
• Follow Along
Instagram: @the_dudela_official
TikTok: @the_dudela_official
YouTube: The Dudela Official
Facebook: The Dudela
 
💪 Your Challenge This Week
Try a Brain Dump.
Set a timer for five minutes and write down everything taking up space in your head.
Work stress. Financial stress. Relationship stress. Home projects. Random to dos. Everything.
 
Then ask yourself:
What actually deserves my attention today?
What can wait?
What am I carrying that I don't need to carry anymore?
 
You might be surprised how much lighter you feel.

Most parenting resources focus on moms.
Most dads are told to just figure it out.
That's exactly why Dudela exists.
In this special rewind episode, John and Michael look back at where Dudela started, how two first time dads found themselves navigating emergency C sections, NICU stays, difficult pregnancies, sleepless nights, and the overwhelming transition into fatherhood, and why they felt called to build something specifically for dads.
What started as a joke on a family vacation became a podcast, a community, and now a growing collection of resources designed to help dads show up with more confidence during one of the biggest transitions of their lives.
John shares the story of bringing premature twin girls into the world after a high risk pregnancy, months of uncertainty, and a month long NICU stay. Michael opens up about an emergency C section that completely changed the birth plan in a matter of minutes. Together, they reflect on what they learned, what surprised them, and what they wish every expecting dad knew before stepping into the delivery room.
But this episode is not just about looking back.
It's about where Dudela is headed next.
We introduce the Dudela Prep Kit, a practical guide built from everything we've learned through our own experiences, conversations with experts, and questions from hundreds of dads. We also share our vision for the future of Dudela, including workshops, community support, resources for new fathers, and creating a place where dads can ask honest questions without feeling judged.
Whether you're expecting your first baby, preparing for delivery day, surviving the newborn stage, or simply trying to become the dad you want to be, this episode is for you.
Here's what we cover:
• The unexpected story behind the name Dudela• What becoming a dad actually felt like for both of us• Emergency C sections, NICU stays, and the moments that changed everything• Why most dads feel unprepared for pregnancy and birth• The mindset shift from spectator to active partner• The value of having other dads in your corner• Lessons learned from 22 episodes and conversations with incredible guests• The biggest questions expecting dads ask us• A behind the scenes look at the new Dudela Prep Kit• What's next for the Dudela community and how we're planning to help more dads
If you've ever searched:
new dad advice, first time father tips, how to prepare for a baby as a dad, what dads should know before birth, NICU dad experience, emergency C section support, pregnancy resources for dads, fatherhood podcast, new parent preparation, dad community, expecting father checklist, newborn survival guide for dads, fatherhood support group, how to support your wife during pregnancy, becoming a dad for the first time
This episode is for you.
Resources Mentioned:
• The Dudela Prep Kit• Free Dad Prep Guide• The Spit Up Society Dad Community
Homework:
If you're expecting, ask yourself this question: "What kind of dad do I want my child to remember?"
Write down three words. Keep them somewhere visible. Start becoming that dad today.
If you know a guy who's expecting a baby, send him this episode.
And if Dudela has helped you in any way, share the podcast with another dad. That's how this community grows.
Ready to feel more prepared for fatherhood?
Grab the free Dad Prep Guide and check out the Dudela Prep Kit at thedudelaco.com.

You do not get to pick the family you are born into. But you do get to build the family you lead.
In part one of our Family Matters series, John and Michael talk about the me to we shift that happens when you go from single guy to husband to dad. Your priorities change fast. Time gets tighter. Opinions multiply. And if you do not define your family values, routines, and traditions, something else will.
This episode is a practical starter kit for designing your family on purpose. We talk dinner table culture, small traditions that your kids will remember forever, and the conversations you need to have with your spouse before outside expectations start steering your home. We also unpack how different family backgrounds collide once you get married, especially around holidays and extended family. One spouse may be used to big loud gatherings, the other may be used to quiet holidays with just a few people. Neither is wrong, but you have to talk about it before it becomes tension.
You will hear simple ideas you can start this week like highs and lows at the table, pancakes and Disney mornings, Sunday snuggles, and an outdoor goal that gets everyone moving. We also give you one of the best questions a dad can ask when he feels unsure. What do you want your kids to say about your home when they are grown. Because you are writing that story right now.
Here is what we cover
The me to we shift and why your priorities change immediately
How to decide what kind of family you want to be, not just what kind of dad
Dinner table culture and why consistency beats perfection
Simple routines that kids thrive on, even as toddlers
Easy conversation starters for kids, highs and lows, giggle and wiggle, and more
How to talk with your wife about values before you announce them to the world
Big family holidays versus quiet holidays and finding middle ground
Traditions you loved growing up and traditions you are ready to leave behind
The outside goal, one thousand hours outdoors and why it shapes your week
The question that changes everything, what do you want your kids to say about you
Values you can design around church, activity, nutrition, and technology boundaries
A simple way to audit your family culture, look at your bank statement and calendar
If you have ever searchedhow to build a strong family culturehow to create family traditionsfamily values for new parentshow to lead your family as a dadmarriage after baby communicationholiday boundaries with in lawshow to set family routines with toddlersdinner table routine for kidsscreen time boundaries for familieshow to be intentional as a parentnew dad podcast family valuesfatherhood podcast about family culture
This episode is for you.
HomeworkAsk each other this question and write it downWhat do we want our kids to say about our home in twenty years
Callouts• Send us one family value you are building right now and we will share favorites in a future episode• Join the Spit Up Society for weekly prompts, dad hacks, and community
 
 
family culture, family values, family traditions, new dad, fatherhood, marriage communication, dinner table routine, toddler routine, holiday boundaries, in laws, screen time boundaries, outdoor family time, intentional parenting

Solo episode from John. Just two minutes. We built the thing we wish we'd had in the third trimester and I want to tell you about it. If your partner is anywhere between week 28 and 40 and you've been feeling like you're missing something you can't quite name, this one's for you.
 
Get the Dudela Prep Kit here
 
Or if that link does't work, type this url into your browser:
https://dudelaco.gumroad.com/l/dudela-prep-kit